Relationships and passing ships | Personal

Relationships and passing ships

In the past I have not been able to maintain long term relationships and most of friendships always seem to falter before any closeness can be established. It is now with my bipolar diagnosis I wanted to explore if this could effect my relationships developing and to what extent.

The symptoms of bipolar (not the actual condition) could be the reason why long term relationships haven’t developed. Due to the fact that I can swing from manic to depressive episodes my change in mood has effected how I am with people and the tolerance levels of others differ. With no explanation my changing behaviour could have been off putting and a warning sign to those I was getting to know. It was a sign that I was not someone to be with as I could blow extreme versions of hot and cold. 

Manic episodes when not treated can make me irritable. In these episodes I tend to disagree more with people because I can. I also take more risks that they may not be happy with and cause tension in relationships. 

Depressive episodes when not treated can make me withdraw from all.  I am reluctant to talk to other and extremely emotional while becoming hopeless. This depressive episode can also effect my sex drive by reducing it and I become less affectionate. This leaves my partner of friends confused and unable to help. They can at times feel rejected by my behaviour and not wanted ultimately making them want to leave. 

During a mixed episode my behaviour is confusing and stressful to those around me and they do not know what to expect or how to react. Once again leaving them with the option to leave as my behaviour can be problematic and stressful. 

Hopefully now with me being medicated and being open and honest with my friends and family it’ll allow me to build on relationships and finally have success in this are that I am always close to but never quite there.

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